Creative Thursday

LOVE - your inner critic

Deadlines met and a new one ahead. One final push- I am officially reviewing the entire book in the next couple of weeks. It's written. Seriously. It's very exciting.

Also on my way to Seattle for a long weekend. While away, I am going to leave you with an article by Sarah. She's right, I do trust her to write for you so I will leave the intro, explaining the intent behind this post to her. 

What I will say is that the inner critic is something we all have to find a way to cohabitate with, maybe even love? Why push against something that when embraced can transform us, making us grow and become better in ways we hadn't thought possible. The trick is finding your own way to embrace this little fellow and I really enjoyed reading about how Sarah has made peace with her Inner Critic.

The Inner Critic by Sarah Stevenson

When I first approached Marisa about writing a post for her blog, it was as part of an email to let her know that my new website would be going live and that I would love for her to take a look at it. As part of the email, I also asked if she would be interested in me writing a post for her readers called: Don’t Let Your 9 to 5 Steal Your Creativity. I almost deleted this portion of the email as, you see, I did not want Marisa to think that I was pushy or wanted yet another thing from her. My inner critic was loud and clear and it took me some time to figure out how to deal with it regarding writing this piece.

 Consider this idea from Tara Mohr, a friend and life coach, “We are hardwired to have the voice of the inner critic. No matter, how good we are at something, how far along we are on our own creative journeys, or even how famous we are; the inner critic is alive and well inside us all. It is part of our safety, security and survival and is a device that is used by our brains to help keep us in our safety zone.”

 So how as entrepreneurs and creatives do we learn to tackle the inner critic and use the inner critic to help propel our projects, business and creative lives into action?

 First, you must give a name to your own inner critic. By naming the critic it will enable you to disarm it when it arises, helping to separate it from yourself. My critics name is Freddy Two-Tone. He is a creative type-wears tennis shoes, sweater and jeans and has a cape. I don’t know how the cape came about but I think it has something to do with being super man or expecting me to be super woman.

 After naming the critic, you must also get to know it. What does it say to you about doing the work, or leaving your job to start your own creative business? Or launching into that next creative project? Who does the inner critic echo? For me it was a combination of an old boss and other people I had known throughout my creative career that always seemed to want to derail me or at least that is what I thought. In addition, he was the same age as I am now, so I could truly identify with my current situation as a new creative business owner.

Once you name and get to know your inner critic, what do you do then? You need to realize that the critic will always be with you but by being able to recognize the different voices that speak to you, you are able to determine who is in charge. Note here, YOU are always in charge not some crazy critic named Freddy Two-Tone. We need to also, realize that the inner critic is actually not the enemy but in fact someone we need to learn to coexist with and not fight. Freddy is cynical: a glass is half empty kind of guy; not at all how I am as a creative person or how I choose to live my own life. So, you see, the inner critic is not the same as our own best thinking but a voice created to question our own intentions and our own way of doing things.

 Once we realize this and only then are we able to move into a relationship with our inner critic. One way of doing this is with humor. By saying something like: “Hi, inner critic...I hear you...?” or taking it by the hand and walking it out of the room, you are placing yourself back in control of the situation. While writing this piece, I had to literally, remove Freddy from my shoulder, say I can do this, I’ve got it covered and I’m going to the library to write, so please leave me to it! Otherwise, I would still be sitting at home with a blank page in front of me, wondering why I could not fill a page with words.

By doing this we are able to move to the final step of checking out what the inner critic is trying to tell you. What ever scenario you are questioning, don’t argue with the critic.  Instead, ask yourself if what the voice is saying is true, and what you are most worried about in regard to the situation at hand. Learn to live lightheartedly with your critic and over time you will be able to say...”I’ve got this situation covered and I am going to be OK.” For me, it was saying, Marisa trusts me enough to write for her audience, I need to trust myself enough to know that I can write for her audience and what I have to say is funny and lighthearted and a step outside of my comfort zone. But I am willing to do it to share a message and to help others grow in their own creative journeys. So thanks Marisa, for trusting me and my inner critic and for having me share with you here today.

 

Sarah Stevenson is a registered interior designer who worked with some of the top design and architecture firms in Chicago. Like so many artists just starting out, she craved a challenging and collaborative environment -- one where her creative would blossom.

 While she certainly worked on creative projects -- one of which was photographed by the the architectural photographer, Hedrich Blessing -- the long hours took their toll. 

 That’s why Sarah now dedicates her work to helping artists and creative people in all fields carve out space in their day. She helps them find time for their own creative explorations — no matter how many hours a week they work.

 Sarah leads group explorations and founded the Create Explore Discover Art Retreat, an annual getaway that brings together women for creative workshops, fresh, local food and nature walks in the Lake Tahoe area. {note from Marisa - I really loved my time at this retreat, held for the first time last year. I highly recommend adding it to your 'retreats to attend' list. Sarah's opening registration June 1st!}

 You can find more about her work at www.sarahgstevenson.com

thank you Sarah for sharing this with us.

'Love' the original is available here

what lens are you choosing to view your world through?

 

I started this year like many of us with resolutions - resolutions for what? resolutions that when achieved will lead to more happiness. Right? Because everything we want and hope to accomplish is because we think it will make us happier?

The difference is this year, I promised to stick with my resolutions longer than just New Year's day {and maybe the day after}.  To be honest, I backed myself far enough into a corner on this one, that I kind of had to. I started 2012 intent on moving past habits, particularly patterns of thought, that even with the apperances of progression, especially over the last 8 years, were still trapping me in the same place. 

Four months later, I can honestly say I've never felt happier. Seriously guys, for someone who is not so much a 'morning person' ~ I am waking up some days with so much enthusiasm, I'm not entirely sure Sean recognizes me. And believe me, when I'm ready, I will have a lot to share on this. Until then, one of my dear friends who also committed to this new years 'experiement' with me passed along the link to this video. I think Shawn's perspective in this TED talk refers exactly to what I have been working towards. The part where he references that happiness is based upon the lens you choose to view your world through - that's it, that's the beginning. And then there's more, a lot more...

permission to be introverts - and be 'Quiet'

This book arrived yesterday. It came highly recommended to Sean by Jan, his step mom. Even though he is a comedic performer, improvising and teaching  Improv in a front of a room full of people, Sean definitely considers himself more of an introvert.

Even though I've barely cracked open the cover, I'm already intrigued and I'm already going to recommend this book to you. 

The cover and the title alone totally caught my eye. I especially like the subtitle "the power of introverts in a world that can't stop talking".  {sometimes I just want to tell people to please stop talking, especially our neighbor who insists upon talking on his cell on speaker phone right outside our window}

And then we watched the TED video by Susan this morning and now I am completely fascinated.

 

I insta/tweeted a picture of the cover this morning and already the people responding with comments saying that they are reading this right now, tells me that we creatives were in need of some validation and permission to be the introverts that I personally think is necessary to do any kind of creative work.

It got me thinking about how introverted I am, really? I was definitely way more introverted as a child. Also being an only means that having a lot of  quiet and alone time is just part of the package.  Somewhere along the way I decided to develop my extrovert muscle and found that I also get energy from socializing. Listening to Susan's talk makes me wonder if I develped that muscle because society applauds that quality more?

I don't do crowds. One reason, I find attending and participating in art fairs particularly challenging. When I go to yoga class, or most classes actually I do not want to socialize. I just want to be quiet and learn. Teaching at larger art retreats and attending conferences, as fun and rewarding as it is can wollop me. I've always been more comfortable in smaller groups or one on one. Probably one of the reasons I've always enjoyed podcasting. A quiet way for me to get a message to many. 

I've discovered that an ideal week for me is an almost equal balance of inward and outward time. Actually I'd say leaning much more with an emphasis on inward time. It's true what Susan says about needing quiet time and unplugging to come up with ideas. How will we ever get our own ideas if we are constantly experiencing a barrage of other people's voices? We won't. And there will just be more of the same. Something that many of us artists think about, how to keep our unique voice evolving and not looking like someone else's vision, or conforming to creating work that is solely inspired by trend.

We have to learn how to tune out and tune in.

This becomes challenging in the world we live in where the noise has become more, not necessarily in decibles or in person socializing, but the social activity around social media. And the panic that ensues when we are not on it, feeling like we are going to be forgotten or left behind. Seriously, this is a myth that needs to be stopped before it gets started. If you do great, meaningful work you will not be forgotten, especially not by the the people who are truly your people.

I know much of my feelings about the quiet time I need are heavily influenced by the city I live in. The sound of the squeaking breaks on the garbage truck that is outside my window RIGHT NOW is SO loud. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate that someone comes so consistently to pick up the trash, but the amount of leaf blowing I hear on any given week has GOT to stop. We live in Los Angeles - I mean really how many leaves are there? 

What I want to say is that living in a big city already calls for much more inward time to balance the energy involved just in getting from point a to point b. And if you happen to be more introverted,  you can only imagine how much more quiet time you might need.

After watching this video I know that both Sean and I, are breathing a big sigh of relief. We feel like we've been given permission to indulge in what comes natural to us. We feel like we want to honor our quiet time more, even when we are together in the same space, Thank you Susan for writing your book and for adding equal value to those who live and create from a softer, quieter space.

How about you? Where do you think you are on the introvert/extrovert scale?

so happy to be home

{I've been away} for the past week speaking at/ attending Alt, and visiting with Lizzy. The fact that I left you with a bear blowing a kiss as my last post tells you where I'm at. 

The first of this year has been filled with me unravelling and quietly closing out much of what I plugged into last year that no longer has any room in my plans going forward.

I think I touched upon the burst of clarity that came with the start of the new year ~ well, attending Alt and all the events that made up this past week really sealed the deal for me. Funny how it always works, right? Getting away from it all to see clearly what is before you.

Alt was exciting, insightful and as non-stop as before {by choice as I stayed up every night until 2 am - yes I'm paying for it now}. This time I did also take a few hours to be creative. The image above is an excerpt from a watercolor I painted in a design camp class lead by Courtney.

So what sealed the deal for me exactly? Well let's just say that one of my favorite panels at Alt this time was the one on life/work balance. And one of my favorite parts of Gretchen Rubin's keynote speech was when she told everyone that 'the first step to finding more happiness is to get enough sleep'.  And then there was Ben, who I spoke with on our panel last year, who gave one of the most real, heartfelt keynote speeches I've heard in a long time, maybe ever? And then there was rooming with EZ who I also spoke with on our panel last year, one of the most gentle, genuine, kind people I've met. And then there was connecting with and meeting for the first time more people who live and create from the heart. And finally rounding out the week spending quality time being happy with Lizzy {while we made big plans, always big plans ;)} Oh and everyone should start their day listening to this beautiful song.

All of these moments lead me to what I had already been intuiting all along. Don't you love when that happens? When everything becomes crystal clear in a moment {the very moment following all of those months or even years that lead up to it} Clarity does not happen overnight. Well it can, but for me it's usually following a lot of back and forth on the subject before something clicks into place that makes me commit to my new decision in a way that I haven't before.

That's where I stand right now. I'm sure it's no accident that it's still relatively early in a new calendar year and that my time away, and my time at Alt is all working together to inspire this new insight. Truth be told I get new insight almost weekly ~ something I love.

But, this, what I'm feeling today. This feels different. My post title speaks directly to how happy I am to be home literally and metaphorically about coming home. 

I have spent much of my life chasing what's next, projecting how I want my life to be on others who I think are already there. And I think in many ways that has worked. Aspiring to be somewhere, someone you are not is a normal part of being human and it can be the very thing that pulls you forward to where you do want to be. The mistake that can happen in constantly choosing this way to be inspired is that you may find yourself thinking that the grass is always greener somewhere else. And when you finally get to that place you wanted to be, sometimes it's not so green and sometimes you miss it all together because you are already out ahead on to the next greener pasture. 

This is exhausting.  Moving forward, desiring more, getting inspired to expand is one of the best parts of being alive but using that drive to miss who you already are and what you already have can leave you with a small hole that never gets filled.  And you know what I'm going to say now, right? That little hole can only be filled by you, appreciating today just as it is. We've all heard it before. It's part of our enlightened, conscious vernacular and these days it rolls off our tongues as if we are living it all the time with the greatest of ease. Not so much. But the fact that we are talking about it means we are headed there and that is exciting.

We do not need to be dissatisfied with where we are to want and reach for more. In fact what if we loved where we are and also reached for and looked forward to more?

The truth is you don't really know what it means 'to be present' 'to truly appreciate where you are' 'to be home' until you glimpse it yourself. Over coffee time this morning, Sean talked about how we 'can't fully understand those concepts until we experience them for ourselves'. And he's right.  I want to add that at some point you just have to commit to finding it, because in all honesty I think this is what we are all chasing anyway - the happiness and contentment that comes from filling that space all on our own.

As is often the case I have so much more I want to share with you on this, and I will.  Because another realization I had at Alt,  is just how much I love my blog and plan to keep it as a part of my creative expression {maybe forever} :)

So I will be back with more thoughts as I've promised for far too long. Just as soon I get caught up on my sleep {thank you Gretchen Rubin} I've been tired for far too long. I've been trying to do too much for far too long. I've been fretting about where I am and where I'm not for far too long.  Don't get me wrong, there's been a lot of fun and awesomeness along the way,  just lately there's been a bit more whining than is necessary. And it's time ~ time to do things differently.

One of the messages I heard repeatedly at Alt and made a point to share in my talk as well, {a quick thank you! to all of you who came to my round table discussion on licensing your designs} is that we are going to make mistakes ~ meaning this is ALL a learning experience. When did we forget that? I don't know what part of us {or me} thought that somehow we had to know how to do everything right all the time, or that somehow we will know exactly how to find our creative voice and exactly how to run a business around it once we find it? Oh and not to mention that we - all of us with a presence in this online world, have it all figured out already and know how to operate within it perfectly? whaaat?? We are the pioneers. There was no one before us because remember this world barely existed 10 years ago? We certainly have more resources and support to get answers, and yet as we get those answers, techonology will inevitably change again, leaving us with more questions.  It's an exciting time.

For now I have an answer, one that I hope stays with me forever, and that is how happy I am to be home.

a bear and a baby

4 x 4 in.

I also started this year thinking about how I want to return to making daily creativity a priority. Probably because I've been writing on this topic quite extensively over the last three months for my book, also because last year I took on too much. A large part of 2011 ended up feeling like a blur of projects one after the other without any time to savor the creative process within each one of them. And right about now some of you might be saying 'hey, at least you have your own business and you get to be creative!' And this is all true. I think you know already that I truly love my work and appreciate what I've built - but to pretend there aren't challenges in said business and that some days you don't want to take all your chips and cash them in and walk away forever {ok maybe not forever but for a while} would be a lie.

Then there's also the beauty of having your own business and running your own show, so to speak. You get to make mistakes - well the mistakes aren't always the beauty part of the process but the learning from them and refining how you choose to do things from there is. You are in charge. Which is great, and also comes with a certain amount of self-imposed pressure that can stress you out if you are not careful. Your mistakes are your own - technically there's nobody to blame but you - you are responsible for it all. 

What I'm saying here {and I'm sure I've said it before} is that I keep making up excuses not to find time for regular creativity.  And yet that is what feeds my business and more  importantly feeds me. So, it's a no brainer really? right? I have every reason to make my creative practice a priority. Yet my daily list keeps getting longer and everything else always feels more important.  Just for the record, so I don't sound like a broken record - I did get help last year! I hired someone to come in and clean every two weeks and I had an intern {a dear friend of mine saved me in more ways than one} come in once a week for the most of the last quarter. This means that I know what a difference getting help offers and that is  first on my list  {ok maybe second, right after more creative time} this year. Slowly but surely I'm sorting it out. I figure if I mention it here on my blog more than once, I'll finally convince myself to actually do what I'm talking about.

At some point you {meaning me} just have to decide that what is most important to you must come first.  So a series of 10 small paintings presented itself in my sketchbook this week, inspired by the 'love for you' bears I painted below. It's a story of sorts {not really} but it made me laugh and I hope it will make you smile too or as I said in my email {maybe even chuckle}. I watched Sean open the first email and he did. He chuckled. 

My plan is to share 10 paintings over the next 10 days. I'm making myself accountable to you, which almost always seems to work {even though I know I still owe you my 30th video...I haven't forgotten :)} I'm sending them to my daily painting list first and then posting them here the following day. Here's the first of 10. I hope you enjoy them.

 

{click here to buy original}

i trust

6 x 6 in.

On the heels of a great conversation about trust that lead to a spontaneous outing to a vintage furniture + gift store in West Hollywood, I came across this very old brass figure in the shape of a deer? donkey? dog? horse? Whatever it is I knew that this little fellow needed to come home with me to live in my studio. And I decided that it would forever be a symbol, a reminder of trusting my life even more.

I talk a lot about trust, in my classes and various blog posts over the years. It's something I'm still working on; trusting that everything is working just as it should, even when I can't quite see exactly how it is coming together - you know? the days when it feels like it might all be going wrong? In my experience, hindsight always reveals that it was all working out perfectly if I could have just relaxed and enjoyed myself more, instead of fret about the future. What can I say, even though I know this now, and I am getting much better at embracing this concept and making it my default setting, because when I do, life flows easier and I feel so much better; I still hesitate to trust fully and I still need small reminders. 

Enter the tiny character above. I thought if I need reminders, maybe you do to? So I share this with you.

 

{click here to buy original}

a clean slate

You know what can happen when you've been blogging for a long time? {And by long time, I mean in blogging terms since I consider this medium to still be fairly new.} You, and by you I mean me, start to repeat yourself. And then if you're like me, you might get slightly bored with your own blog.

I've always been honest about the fact that I'm not a journaler, and I didn't start a blog as a means of having an online journal or expressing myself as a writer. I started it to share my art and also my podcast. Somewhere along the way I learned that I do in fact love sharing my thoughts with you from time to time, and that's where some of those really lengthy posts come in.

I think what has happened between then and now is that I've felt like my blog should be something that ultimately isn't me. I know I've thought of this before, but I still got caught up in what I thought a blog should be not how a blog would support and complement who I truly am. But in truth, keeping a consistent blog is exactly what has helped me become clearer about who I am.

Five years into blogging ~ yes, just passed that mark in July and completely forgot to acknowledge it, so I guess this is my acknowledgement {yay! for 5 yrs} ~ I'm having a full circle moment. Sometimes you have to try all kinds of 'different' to find your way back to what you started with. Exactly what happened in my career that ultimately lead me to Creative Thursday.

What I'm realizing is that

    First: I am an artist.

I favor expressing myself through imagery that I create, whether it be a painting, a photograph, or any of the other creations I make.

    Second: I am a voice

I also love sharing my thoughts out there in the world. This is where podcasting, writing, video-blogging speaking and teaching come in to the mix. 

As you know if you listened to my last podcast, I'm not about making big proclamations. I don't even know exactly where this post trying to lead me, I just know that it's once again time for a change.

I know that I love blogging and this practice of keeping a blog has been so helpful to me, as I mentioned above, particularly in the discovery and development of my art and my voice. Not to mention the community of people I have also come to know over the last five years. Sometimes when I stop to think about it, I remember just how incredible all of this blogging business is.

It's Labor Day weekend here in the states, and since I've had my own business, this weekend has taken on a bit of a New Year's feel to it. I know it's also influenced by a season transition, especially from summer to fall. Memories of that back to school time, the changing of grades, preparing to learn again, the new clothes that I couldn't wait to wear and the new notebooks that couldn't wait to organize - It's no wonder that this time of year always feels like the start of something new. 

I still love getting some new clothes and I guess my new notebook to organize is now my blog. This year in particular I have a big project starting, this week actually, and my fabric line is also officially making it's way out into the world, very soon. So it really does feel like the start of a brand new evolution to Creative Thursday.

I'm excited to share all of this with you in the coming weeks and thought I'd clear the decks a little on the blog design {inspired by, you guessed it- Garbo}. A palate cleansing if you will? The sorbet in between the main course. Enjoy the rest of your holiday weekend if you're in the states, and I'll see you back here soon.

Thanks for continuing to come along on the journey with me. 

the little underbelly and the little sackbelly

2.5" x 2.5" in a brand new circle shape

There's a story to this one.

I've been sharing, in multiple conversations recently, that I can no longer truly connect with those who aren't willing to reveal their underbelly. Oh I can chat with you, but I'm never going to connect with you. And what do I mean by this exactly?

I meant this: It's life. We all have soft little underbellies. They are our vulnerabilities. And the question is are vulnerabilities flaws? It seems as though that is how they are perceive. In fact, it has been taught to us that's it not a good idea to reveal our vulnerabilities because this makes us appear weak? You see it in the animal kingdom all the time. When one animal shows submission they roll over and reveal their bellies. So it makes sense probably, way down there in our DNA, for us to always try to protect our underbellies. But we are not animals, we are human beings, many of us with an evolved level of consciousness living on the planet at this time.  So what I'm suggesting is that if we all have underbellies, what if we started becoming comfortable in revealing them more? You know, I'm not talking about airing dirty laundry will nilly ;) I'm talking about seeing our vulnerabilities as a genuine part of who we are coupled with a willingness to work on them. That's called being human.

The work it takes to communicate with someone who chooses protecting their insecurities and vulnerabilities as their primary way of operating in this world - is too much. Too much work people. I don't have it in me to figure all of that out, before I maybe, just maybe get a glimpse of the real you.

Can't we just save it all that energy for something else, like being creative perhaps?

What's it going to take for us to be real, right away. 

To me it is not a sign of weakness to acknowledge your soft little underbelly, accept it, maybe even embrace it. Instead I see it as a sign of strength.

 

{click here to buy original}

get your house in order

5 x 7 in.

This has been a theme of mine lately.

Well, not just lately but especially over the last two years. As you know if you've been following the blog. My passion/obsession for de-cluttering and re-organizing seems to be my new summer past time?!

Recently I was faced with a big decision, one of those do I or don't I? kind of decisions and the person helping me make it said 'Well, this is about getting your house in order. You want to get your house in order." And as soon as he said that, I knew. I knew I needed to go ahead with it and I knew in the moment that I was making the right decision.  

I don't know but if you're at all like me, sometimes you take projects etc. to certain level of completion, meaning = you don't quite finish it. You don't quite follow all the way through. I have no idea what that is, where it comes from or why I do it?! Any thoughts? It manifests itself in quite a few different ways with me, not just professionally but personally too. And quite honestly, it's a habit that's getting a bit old and tiresome. I don't know what I'm afraid of? That if I complete something, get it in order, suddenly there will be nothing left to do? Oh, but there always is. And really it feels so much better to see something to completion.  To handle my business. To get my house in order. 

And then make a painting about it. ;) 

{click here to buy original}

turns out you learn a lot on twitter

There's always a lot of dialogue about social media these days. Whether it's useful or a time suck?

I would say that for most of us, it is a little of both.

Since I left Facebook I'll just speak about twitter. It really depends upon who you follow and how you decide to use it as to which above categories your time on twitter falls into.

I've tweeted about the fact that recently I have been 'almost entirely successful' in making self care + balance and well being my highest priority. This means a lot of things, but pertaining to today's topic it mostly means less time online.

I guess that's why this morning when I finally spent some time on twitter,  I felt like I could really indulge following a lot of threads to various videos and articles.  Let's face it. There is just so much content out there now? What stands out and what is really worth paying attention to? I don't have the answer to that. I'm working on it. In the meantime here are a few links that really stood out to me.

 

• Ez wrote a great post sharing a tip about using Pinterest to help understand your readers/shoppers. I have yet to accept my invitation to Pinterest...speaking of time. But I love it. I really do. It's a beautiful, inspiring site. Speaking of 'paying attention' I have to say that sometimes I wonder if you all are really listening out there? So many of you visit here daily, but only a very few of you talk to me regularly. Do not misunderstand - I totally and completely get it for the same reason: there's too much content which means there's too much to respond to as well. But still - even though I keep this blog as a personal record of my journey, I am sharing it with you and thinking of what you might enjoy when I'm posting.  Sometimes I wonder if I'm still providing inspiration and useful content? Entering this blog's URL into Pinterest revealed to me that you are following along out there, you are still interested and inspired and many of you are drawn to the same images, colors and creations right now. {see above} So interesting.
• Two very thoughtful and insightful videos on innovation among designers, specifically independent designers and how that relates to trade shows. One by Susy and one by Megan
• And a great article about no longer giving everything away for free 'No you cannot pick my brain- it costs too much' - I may have to continue this discussion...